Thank You Xander Harris
by Ionuin Anam Cara
Summary: Remember when Xander gave Buffy the speach, in season 5, about love when Riley was leaving... well start there, then correct the ending and you have the gist of this ficlet


Title: Thank You Xander Harris

Author: Vampyr Slayer

Notes: screw timelines. Ignore the creative license taken when reproducing the quote at the beginning.

Summary: In season 5, when Riley is leaving, Xander gives Buffy a speech about deciding if she really loves Riley and if she is willing to make the sacrifices and get in the messy kind of love. This is my ending to it.

Disclaimer: I own nothing. I just like to let Buffy and Angel out for fresh air every now and then since Joss has them locked up like animals…

Xander: "You shut down, Buffy. He's the one that comes along once in a lifetime. He's never held back with you. He's risked everything. And you're about to let him fly because you don't like ultimatums?  
If he's not the guy, if what he needs from you just isn't there, (shakes head) let him go. Break his heart, and make it a clean break. But if you really think you can love this guy ... I'm talking scary, messy, no-emotions-barred need ... if you're ready for that ... then think about what you're about to lose."

Buffy ran.

Through the woods, heart pumping, feet pounding, the slayer ran. _I can't let him go. I can't._ _Xander is right. I have to get him back, even if I have to tie him down and gag him so he will shut up long enough for me to tell him everything; make him believe that we belong together, that I'm his._

Buffy didn't care about the strange looks she was getting, the cars honking as they passed. She didn't care about the distance. She didn't feel the muscles burning and cramping for running so far in her boots. She didn't care about how much she was ruining her boots. She didn't notice anything. All she knew was that she was going to get back and keep him forever. _ Almost there_. She felt that he wasn't in the direction she was headed, so, without stopping, she shifted her course, heading towards her lover.

Bursting into a clearing she saw him. She saw him and her whole body seemed to stop and speed up at the same time. He was there, dressed in his standard dark clothing, eyes shining, and features shifted from the fight he was engaged in. Buffy just watched, admiring the grace and fluidity of his movements, rippling of his muscles. His movements faltered for a second before resuming the beautiful dance again. He knew. He felt her presence.

The battle ended. The others who had been helping him, his friends, left. He stood there, facing away from her, gathering his strength. Buffy moved forward, slowly walking towards him. Gently she pressed herself against his back, reveling in he feel of his body. "I love you," she whispered. She felt his body tense as he tried to turn around. Gripping him tighter around the waist she halted his movements. "Don't. Just listen, please. I love you. I have always loved you. I can't lose you. I would go to the ends of the earth and the deepest depths of hell for you. Being what I am, I don't get forever. I just get now. And though I thought I could let go, I can't. I'm never going to change. I can't change. I want my life to be with you. Please don't make me leave and just exist. It's not living when you aren't here. I love you, Angel."

Buffy stopped. The tears streaming down her face ended her profession and her arms fell to her sides. Her legs gave out beneath her and she slid, silently crying, to the ground.

Angel hesitated. He had spent the last two excruciating years without her. Why should she be here now? He turned around and saw her, vulnerable and defenseless, sitting on the ground. His heart shattered in a million pieces. Just watching her he could tell that she had done this often, if not every night since his departure. She was resigned to let the tears flow till they had all but dried up.

Angel knelt down on the ground, soundlessly, and took the beautiful goddess into his arms. He knew that he wasn't going to let her go, not this time.

Buffy burrowed deeper into Angel's embrace as her body slowly came back from the pit of despair she knew so well. _This is home. This is where I belong. Why doesn't he see how perfect we are for each other?_

Angel, much to Buffy's chagrin, pulled Buffy out of his arms enough so that he could talk to her face to face. Brushing the hair off her face, Angel looked straight into his love's eyes. He saw pain, suffering, lies, sadness, and, buried deep beneath the surface, love.

"I love you, Buffy. I'm sorry I left. It was stupid and wrong and I'm sorry. I love you soo much. The last two years have been agony. The pain stops here. I'm never letting you go again. I promise you. Till your forever ends, I will be here with you. We will make this work." Angel sealed his promise with a sweet, lingering kiss.

Buffy looked into the mahogany depths of her Angel's eyes and smiled. She knew that everything would be okay. Buffy leaned in and kissed Angel with all the passion and love and anxiety from the separation, leaving them both breathless.

As they stood to go back to the Hyperion, Buffy giggled. "What," asked Angel? "Just thinking," Buffy replied. "About what?" "What got me here. Remind me to give Xander a big thank you when I get back to Sunnydale." "Okay."

"Wait…. Xander?"

Buffy giggled again.

END


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